You wanted the comeback to be hard. Admit that, because it explains the whole month.

Hard would have been a story. Hard would have been earned back, ounce for ounce,
and you could have paid the two years off in instalments you were able to feel.

Instead it came back in nine weeks like nothing,
which means the two years did not cost you four years of progress.
They cost you two years of nothing at all,
and nothing at all is a great deal harder to grieve than a punishment.

The Book of the Fallen — Grind 64:4